Altogether now - they shine for you and me, for liberty. Fernando

By Adam Smith on Sep 10, 08 03:57 PM in Fans

Fantastic news that Wilf Bouma is on the mend and we have got the bottle to give a bloke on a sick bed a two year contract.

He is a Villa hero. Not your Pongo, Chico, Gray, Little, Withey, McInally or McGrath type of hero.
Not even an Aitkin, Gibson or Birchy kind of a hero. Probably not even an Olney kind of hero.

But a hero never the less.

Bouma is more of a 'cult hero', in the mould of the great Fernando 'there was something in the air that night' Nelson.

They both came with a decent reputation from their homeland and were part of a 'golden generation' of players, that didn't include them!

Both looking to make a buck and name in the Premier League.

Nelson, full name Fernando Nelson Jesus Vieira Alves, came in 1996.

What a year, we were young, full of life and none of us prepared to die, and the Blues still had Barry Fry.

Never the biggest player on the pitch he was a step up than our other pint sized 1990s defenders Earl Barrett and Darius Kubicki.

He looked a bit lost in his first five games and even a bit scared but then something stirred inside him, he trimmed his bouffant and started to play out of his skin.

He played so well, in fact, the Portugese form sent Gary Charles on a spiral of destruction that ended with him doing 'a Paula Radcliffe' on a residential street and spending more time in court than Pete Doherty.

I can remember, one starry night, against Athletico Madrid at Villa Park he never put a foot wrong. But it was all to no avail because we still tragically lost.

Then, one fateful night he crossed the Rio Grande and John Gregory sold him.

The manager just could not keep his feeling in check and could not control his jealous fits over Fernando's hair and catchy Abba chant.

And without even 'a goodbye or leave ya' he was off.

Happily he won the league at Porto and saw out his days at the greatly named SC Rio Tinto where he is now old, grey and President.

Bouma, full name Wilfred Dirk Van Der Fart Van Gogh Bouma, took a little longer to settle in than our Fernando.

In fact for his first season he looked like a bouncer who had lost his job for punching one to many people and took up football to pay for an expensive habit of buying big coats.

Obviously overweight and forced to play alongside Ridgewell, he never looked a world beater but had one hell of a shot on him which he let everyone see every third game.

Then Mr O'Neill arrived and our big Dutch man played more often, stopped eating kippers, and made the position his own.

He even played in the Euro 2008 for the Dutch team that lit up the championships.

But after a family holiday windmill spotting his leg went one way and his ankle went the other and his season was over before it started.

It was a heartfelt ovation the crowd gave him as he was taken off in agony and I for one am over the moon that he will be at the club for a few more seasons.

If only Fernando had been given another contract instead of been the first mistake of Gregory's error strewn era. Oh Fernando.

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4 Comments

Non-Villa fan said:

Tremendous blog again Skidder man.

It is true, perhaps if his hair wasn't more stylish than Grecian Greg's then he may have stayed longer.
But you know something with him in the team...
"I thought Villa could never lose, but there's no regret and if they had to sign him again,
They would sign their friend, Fernando!"

Adam Smith Author Profile Pagesaid:

Thanks pal.

Of course the Fernando hair dispute was just the forerunner to the great L'Oreal wars of the late 1990s between egomaniac gregory and 'gregory's girl Ginola' they say hate is born from love and love tore itself apart as Gregory demanded the frenchman trained like a kid and then slammed his body in print. Free kick. top corner against Tottenham at home and the Frenchman strode up to the potmarked fool and took his top off like he was raving in the Hummingbird in the early 90s.
Crazy days. Fernando got off lightly. like the ex-wife of a late in life starting serial killer

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